Tag Archives: Distractions

Three Shifts That Change EVERYTHING!!!

WhenYouChangeTheWayYouLookAt Things_DyerChange

In Coaching, a shift indicates a transition from one place or position to another. A Coach can create an environment for a shift to occur, but only the Coachee can actually make the shift. In my coaching, I have observed 3 shifts that make a world of difference for clients. And while a shift will mean different things to different people, overall it tends to feel like wholeness and self-acceptance, which are vital to happiness. I share the below tips in hopes that readers benefit from the information below and it moves them towards an increased state of happiness, harmony and wholeness. The three Shifts are:

  1. From Roles to Relationships: Oftentimes, we see ourselves in roles – Wife, Husband, Supervisor, Employee, etc.  Roles indicate duties  – things we should do, would do and could do. Yet these roles also signify relationships and connections – things we get to do, choose to do and want to do. Seeing roles as relationships aligns with one’s values and speaks to who they are.  As a person gains a greater awareness of themselves, roles and accomplishments seem less urgent and they in turn just want to find and enjoy who they are and what they contribute to their relationships. (Gibson, 2016).
  2. From Distraction to Decision: Choice Overload Theory observes that too many options lead to adverse consequences like decreased motivation to choose or a greater chance for dissatisfaction once a choice is made. Today, individuals have an array of choices when it comes to choosing careers, places to live, things to do and places to go (Scheibehenne et. al., 2010). So many choices can be a distraction to the key question – ‘What outcome do you want?’ When one shifts from distraction to decision, they gain focus – and the minute we block out distractions and make decisions, whatever we focus on will inevitably be the best choice.
  3. From Extrinsic to Intrinsic: In his New York Times Best-Seller, Drive (2009), Daniel Pink argues that the secrets to high performance and satisfaction rest in the deeply human need to direct our own lives, to learn and create new things, and to do better by ourselves and our world. This assertion challenges popular misconceptions that money, position and other’s opinions drive us to greater achievement. By connecting with our intrinsic motivations, we make decisions that align with who we are and who we aspire to be, not external influences which can lead to living someone else’s life and achieving someone else’s dreams.

The common theme amongst each shift is the need to get clear on who we are. In the words of John Whitmore (2009), “Self – Awareness leads to Self – Confidence leads to Self – Fulfillment.” Now, GET GOING!!!!

References:

Coach U. (2005). The Coach U Personal and Corporate Coach Training Handbook. Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons, Inc.

Gibson, L. (2016, April). Your Three Life Goals. Tidewater Women. P.19.

Pink, D. (2009). Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us. New York: Riverhead Publishing, Inc.

Scheibehenne, B., Greifeneder, R., & Todd, P. M. (2010). Can There Ever Be Too Many Options? A Meta-Analytic Review of Choice Overload. Journal of Consumer Research, 37(3), 409-425.

Whitmore, J. (2009). Coaching for Performance: GROWing Human Potential and Purpose – The Principles and Practice of Coaching and Leadership, 4th Edition. Boston, MA: Nicholas Brealey Publishing.